Again, we return to the question of progress to success and raise a topic that does not bring money literally, but is a factor, very seriously affecting this movement. So, the simplest and, at the same time, one of the most difficult little things leading to success is … a compliment.
Compliments are such things that help to find contact with people and establish good relations with them, which means that they are important. And also they are pleasant! Of course, if this is a compliment made skillfully, to the place and most importantly – sincerely.
In developed countries, where business has long ceased to lock on shuttle trips to Turkey and the creation of fraudulent joint-stock companies, business communication is a philosophical discipline, with a good admixture of psychology.
History knows examples of the growth of the welfare of huge corporations in almost the same optimism and the ability to communicate with the people of the founders of these corporations. The most cynical money bag will look at you as a lost brother in your childhood, if you can just put it in a human way.
And where does our sympathy for man begin? As a rule, with the fact that he skillfully stressed some of our dignity. Here and further we declare – the ability to make a compliment (rather than flatteringly flattering), touching the necessary, secret strings of the soul of the addressee, to which it is addressed – is the essence of half the success.
Here are some simple rules of this pleasant affair: First, a compliment should be extremely specific. You must clearly understand what you liked about this person. The incision of the eyes, the combination of hair color with a new suit, successfully superimposed cosmetics or character. Otherwise our “psychological focus” will be sewn with white threads and turn into that most undesirable flattery.
For practice, try using the phrase “because”. It will help you to specify your thoughts and, most importantly, to concentrate more deeply on the interlocutor. For example: “Lisa, you are an intelligent woman, because you are always able to distribute your working time so effectively.”
Note that the compliment ceased to be groundless, and the notorious Lisa blushed, while simply stating her mind would not have produced half of that impression. By making such a sincere compliment, you not only help a person feel your respect, you (surprise!) Understand why you respect him, and this helps you feel the sincerity of what was said. And this is very important. Insincerity is always noticeable, and unpleasant.
Second, avoid focusing only on the obvious. Pay attention to the hidden qualities. “You performed so beautifully! It’s amazing how you managed to exhaust this topic in a five-minute report! Our department is beating on her for the third week. ”
Remember, was there a case in your life when you felt particularly flattered? For sure, it was when someone managed to notice in you some hidden talent.
Well, and finally. Spend a week making compliments to everyone, for practice: a secretary, a waiter, a janitor, a stupid colleague (him too!), Customers, anyone. After a week of experience, you can try to make it to your boss. And continuing to sow compliments, you will feel the illustration of the well-known principle “Good returns with a boomerang”.